If I Paid For My Friends, I Didn't Pay Nearly Enough.

With recruitment just around the corner (where does the time go?), it's that time of year for the skeptics to come around, tongues blazing, to make sure everyone knows that joining a sorority is absolutely the worst thing you could ever do.  This is for a few reasons, the most popular of which is:

You're paying for your friends.

So, today, being a week away from reuniting with some the best young women I've ever met, I feel inclined to clarify a few things.

1. Dues cover the cost of functions, meal plans, housing and other resources meant to help YOU.

Sure, functions aren't "necessary," but what's wrong with wanting to get dressed up with your best friends and have a night of fun?  That's not something that's unique to Greek life.  Meal plans and having a place to live, study or just hang out isn't unique to Greeks either.  As far as resources, many Greek organizations employ people from the University to support their members academically.  And guess what?  The all-Greek GPA is consistently higher than the non-Greek GPA!

2. You don't need to join a sorority to make friends.

This is 100% true, and that's why you don't join a sorority just to make friends.  However, at a school of about 30,000 people, it's nice to have an outlet to meet new people.  Sororities make a big school feel much smaller, and they give individuals a platform to shine in ways that wouldn't necessarily be possible on a larger scale (like the entire University).  That being said, sororities DO seek people out based on their values.  So although you can find friends anywhere, in a sorority you are given an opportunity to form deeper friendships based on values.

3. Sororities DO make a positive impact on the entire community.
(This is my favorite one).

Like I said, this is my favorite one, and that's because the idea that all we care about is ourselves is just blatantly wrong.  At least here at the Alpha Lambda chapter it is.  Although it doesn't all come down to philanthropy, it's the most important thing to us, so it's all I'll mention here.  I'm by no means saying that non-Greeks aren't philanthropic or don't care about helping others.  There's tons of people who are philanthropic on their own.  And that rocks.  Seriously.

But for us, our sorority gives us an outlet to support causes we truly believe in.  Here at Tri Delta, it's St. Jude.  On our own, we couldn't pull off events that bring hundreds of people together to support St. Jude or do a letter-writing campaign that raised almost $100,000.

Every year since I've joined this incredible organization, our chapter has raised over $100,000 for the kids.  Many of us have even spent weekends driving the 10+ hour drive to Memphis, TN, to see our hard work firsthand on the walls of the hospital and in the eyes of the patients we serve.  And don't just take it from me--just last week, Tri Delta was named the St. Jude Partner of the Year for our newest commitment to fund an entire housing facility of the patients and their families.  Out of all the hundreds of organizations that help St. Jude, they thought it best to recognize us.  That is truly something special.

So, all in all, I just want to say that joining Tri Delta has been one of the best decisions I've ever made.  It's given me friendships and opportunities I couldn't have imagined as a wide-eyed high school senior without a clue.

Now, as a rising college senior graduating in December and freaking out about living in the "real world" miles away from the girls who have made me a stronger, more competent and complex woman than I used to be, I can confidently tell you one thing:

If I paid for these friends, I didn't pay nearly enough.

These girls became my second family after the summer my real family fell apart.  Two in particular went from complete strangers to my best friends all in one night when I broke down around a campfire.  I don't think I've ever told them quite how much that meant to me.  So, to them: thank you. I love you.

If Greek life still isn't for you, that's fine--this post isn't meant for you.  This post is meant for those of us who were told, wrongly, what it meant to be a "sorority girl."  I was one rash decision away from never even giving sorority life a chance, all because of what I'd "heard."

I write this for you today to personally urge you not to let anyone make your decisions for you.  Plus, proving people wrong is kind of fun, isn't it? :)

Delta love and all of mine,

Kellie

Summer Series: Delaney Horel in Uganda

During the summertime (or any other time, really), there is absolutely no shame in taking time for ourselves.  To relax on the beach.  To kickstart our career path.  To enjoy time with old friends.  Still, some people constantly seek to serve others regardless of the time of year.  Delaney Horel is one of those people (YGG).  Delaney is a rising senior math major pursuing a career as a teacher.  She spent her summer serving at a school in Uganda, a dream that anyone who knows her heard her talk endlessly about (and when you read this post, you'll understand why).  Yet as she recounts this life-changing trip, she considers herself more of a learner than a teacher.  For those of us who know Delaney, we know that she probably had a much greater impact on the children than she will ever admit.  Her outlook on this trip and on life is uncommon and refreshing.  We can't wait to have you back, Delaney!

"About a 2-hour boat ride from the mainland of Uganda there is an island known as Lingira.  It is approximately five miles in circumference and home to about 3,000 people—nearly all of who live crowded villages composed of small, grass-thatched, mud huts. The economy of Lingira is built on the fishing industry and the average working man makes about $2 per day. Furthermore, there is no electricity, running water, or sanitation systems on the island.  This place was my home for the summer.

A typical day on the island went something like this: I woke up around 7:30 a.m., ate breakfast, "took tea" (a Ugandan habit and phrase I picked up), and went about doing my daily chore of sweeping. Eventually, I walked to Lingira Living Hope Secondary School. (Yes, amazingly enough there is a secondary school on the island. There is a primary school as well.)  Here, I observed class and worked with the math teacher to develop his methods.  When exams came around, I worked with students on review and preparation. Wednesday evenings, I attended fellowship in Katonga village. Saturdays, I attended the female students' Bible study at school. Sundays, I attended service at Kyoya Deliverance church.  During my free time I read and explored. Some days, I set up my hammock in a tree and rested while I listened to the sound of Lake Victoria in the background.  Other days, I walked over to the school to watch football (soccer) and hang out with students. Island life was simple. And I loved that about it.

Living in a new place meant experiencing new things. And in Uganda, I welcomed every opportunity to do something for the first time. Like eat the eye of a fish (a beloved Ugandan delicacy). Or bathe from a basin (no running water remember?). Or ride on a boda boda (the fastest, most fun, and possibly most unsafe, way to move around mainland). Or attend a Ugandan wedding (during which not just one, but four couples were united) whilst wearing a traditional gomesi (a gown which is made of many yards of fabric and somehow not so comfortable).  To these experiences and many others like them, I owe my appreciation: they enabled me to immerse myself in the Ugandan culture and become as Ugandan as I possibly could. Sometimes (most times) they also put me outside of my comfort zone, forcing me to evaluate my limits and challenging me to change them.

Indeed, I have many stories to tell about my summer on Lingira. Yet the memories that I made are not as important to me as the lessons that I learned.

All the while I went to Uganda to serve and instead I was served.  You see, Ugandan culture is centered around community and making people feel "most welcome" (another native phrase I picked up).  Hence, apart from my own initial hesitations, getting to know everyone around me was not very difficult and I am incredibly thankful for the ways they built me up while doing so: the students of the school spoiled me with their endearing kindness and appreciation, the people of the island blessed me with their genuine optimism and joy. Despite their deprived living conditions, their spirit is thriving. The islanders have a hope that gives them life and there is nothing of this world that could ignite the light that radiates from them all.

So, even though…
I did not take a hot shower.
I did not have air conditioning.
I did not wear anything that hit above my knee.
I did not wear make-up.
I did not style my hair.
I did not drive a car.
I did not have constant Internet access.
I did not send a single text message.
And I did not eat Chipotle or Chick-Fil-A.
…All summer long, I was completely content. Because what I did instead was far more satisfying.  Living on Lingira taught me that true fulfillment is not found in material possessions and comforts, it is found in relationships—in spending time with people who love you and encourage you with authenticity and compassion.

And I am eternally grateful for the gift of a sisterhood that does so. Steadfastly.

DL,
Delaney"

Summer Series: Alex Randall

Today, we are so excited to continue our summer series with another sister spotlight about one of our members.  Alex Randall is a rising senior at Carolina and an active contributing member to both the sorority and the University as a whole.  So, it's no wonder she landed one of the nation's most coveted internships working for FOX Sports in New York City!  Alex is one of many examples of our tenacious members following their dreams and achieving them in ways they never dreamed possible.  We couldn't be more proud of her and are so excited to share her experience with you!

"When most people asked me how in the world I got a job with Fox Network Group in New York City, my response was, “I literally have no idea."  In today’s job market, to get a job, let alone your dream job, it helps to have a connection high up in the company.  I didn’t have one of those at Fox. After applying for over 40 different internships, being frustrated only hearing from half, I was exhausted. In my interview with Fox, the person from HR flat-out said, 'We have over 500 applicants right now and are taking 18. We also already have many qualified people so you tell me why you should get this internship and impress me.'

I was immediately thrown off and just started talking about Carolina, my work and leadership experience to break the ice. I also added some humor to the conversation. When asked how a '…girl from NJ got a southern accent,' I responded by stating, 'When I’m in SC people think I have a northern accent…when I’m in NJ, people think I have a southern accent,  I will bring both to the internship if I get hired.'

When I didn’t hear back from Fox by the deadline, I was SO discouraged and decided I would go to Italy for a Maymester. I booked everything but my flight, but then came the Fox congratulations email. Words cannot explain how excited I was to receive an offer from Fox.  Landing a job at Fox Sports in advertising and sales was a phenomenal opportunity. From the beginning, I didn’t really know what network ad sales involved besides people buying air ads.  At the end of my internship I knew so much more from a practical and sales standpoint.  By the way, even though I canceled my Maymester plans, I ended up touring Europe through hostels for two weeks before the Internship started which helped grow my independence even further.

The first day working in NYC was probably the most intimidating day I have ever experienced. The commute from my home in northern NJ to the Port Authority in Manhattan was an eye opener but exhilarating.  As I navigated the NY streets and avenues I approached this gigantic Newscorp building that was home to multiple companies, Fox News channel, Fox Entertainment, Wall Street Journal, NY Post etc. I walked into a sea of interns who were also checking in at the Fox front desk (Next to Bill O’Reilly’s studio). I literally knew no one.

Even though there were 18 interns from all over the country we all had at least one mutual friend. One intern was actually the cousin of a fellow Delta, Mary Henderson (small world). Everyone at Fox was super nice and professional. Everyone in Fox Sports also asked about our favorite football star, Clowney. Even after two short weeks I felt like I was already a part of the Fox family. The first time I met my boss I had to take the initiative and find him.  Upon locating him, I was met with, “I didn’t even know I had an intern!”  He was a hilarious and wonderful person to work with…turns out he also lived a few towns over from me in NJ.

Besides developing relationships in the office with interns and Fox employees I also had a few celebrity sightings. I saw Dog the Bounty Hunter, Matt Bomer, Mark Walhberg, Eli Manning, Velociraptor and Humans of NY. Just the other day I walked right by Jesse McCartney, my childhood crush.  Since it was 8 am in the morning I questioned taking a picture with him.  Once he knew he had been “spotted” he hopped into his black sedan car and peaced out, I should’ve acted more quickly!   Fox also gave us a few perks including free movies screenings and personal viewing of 2014-2015 pilots for the next year. Gotham the prequel to beginning of Batman is going to be amazing--highly recommend seeing it!!

During my internship I had to pick a national casual dining restaurant and make a pitch to them on why they should invest in Fox Media Group as opposed to other networks. I was paired up with 5 other interns with Fox Sports along with other interns working for Fox and FX (Hispanic media and NatGeo). The restaurant we thought worked perfectly with Fox Sports was Buffalo Wild Wings, “Wings Beer Sports.” In addition to being assigned to supervisors and mentors, we also were assigned to team leaders who were a tremendous help!  Throughout the summer we researched the Buffalo Wild Wings, visited with them, and strategized the pitch.  To complete our assignment, we had to present the pitch to a Fox audience at the end of the internship. Everyone joked around saying how many people would attend.  We were assured that it would not be “…as many as in the past… not a big deal.” Well it turns out we presented a 20 minute pitch to over 200 people, the Fox president, execs, basically everyone you could think of…no pressure there, right?   

Thankfully my leadership roles at Carolina, voice performance/ theater background and public speaking came in handy for the Buffalo Wild Wings presentation.  Because we did so well and the Account Execs loved our ideas they are actually sharing our proposal with the client, Buffalo Wild Wings!

Some other fascinating things I got to do at Fox was sit in on phone calls with my team and client, observe how ad/sales works, communicate with the west coast, visit other networks like the YES network, have viewing parties of the World Cup (I won the bracket), hear other incredible Fox speakers in education sessions and even take Ad Sales 101. At the end of this internship  l certainly realized that Ad sales is so much more than selling TV air time and you must be passionate about the job that you hold in the work force. 'Treat getting a job, like it’s your job,' said my mentor.

I’ve learned that if you want to work in NYC it’s worth the time and effort.  Every challenge is an opportunity. Waking up at 5:30 a.m. and coming home after 7 p.m. is exhausting but very rewarding. Welcome to the real world! Absorb everything when you have a job of a lifetime.  It was so worth it. The walk to and from the Fox building on Avenue of the Americas, across from Radio City Music Hall, was always very entertaining. From walking through Times Square seeing super heroes and naked cowboys, to being in the theatre district and hoping to see James Franco or Bradley Cooper, to being close to Rockefeller center was phenomenal and a taste of what I want to continue to pursue after graduation.

I can’t wait to see all of you in a couple weeks!

Delta Love and all of mine,

Alex Randall"

UIFI

This year, rising senior Hannah Stroud and rising sophomore Hayley Geis were given scholarships and the opportunity to attend the UIFI leadership conference in Indiana last month.  While there, Hannah and Hayley were placed into different small groups to encourage them to reach out and make new connections with Greek leaders from across the country. Today's post is all about the invaluable experiences from UIFI that helped shaped them into even better leaders for our sorority, told by each of their individual perspectives.

Hannah (far right) with her UIFI friends from LSU, University of Washington and University of Iowa

"So, this may come as a shock to those of y’all that know me. I’m not sappy…some say I may not have tear ducts. Well surprise, I do. And writing about my whole experience may actually bring on some of those emotions. Here we go.

APPLYING

Woohoo, an opportunity to travel to a new place over the summer and learn something? I’m in. When I was applying for the Eve Woods Riley Scholarship to go to UIFI, I honestly had no idea what I was signing up for. It took a little over a week to fill out and go through the application before I finally submitted it—partly due to my lack of organization, and partly from my undiagnosed ADD. A few weeks later I was excited to find the ‘Congratulations!‘ email in my inbox, but still didn’t know what I had signed up for.

STALKING THE UIFI FACEBOOK GROUP

What? This is like the Freshman year Facebook group all over again… everyone’s like “Write where you’re from and your chapter”. I was way too casual for that until I started realizing that people were coming from all over the country—heck, one kid came from Mexico. So I did my stalking and some of the kids looked kind of cool, some more interesting than anything. I figured it would be a large group of power-hungry, unrealistic Greeks eagerly waiting to “change the face” of their organizations, at best.

Hannah with sisters from University of Cincinnati and University of the Pacific at Bowling Night!

AIRPORT AND SHUTTLE RIDE

Yes, it was just like Freshman orientation. I was greeted at Baggage Claim 4 by what was clearly a group of college Greeks—the giant letters on their shirts may have given it away. Don’t get me wrong, I was in my Deltas too, and I was all about the small talk and asking if we knew people from the same school. As we all sat and talked for an hour or so waiting on the shuttle, I met kids from Washington, New York, Arizona, and Louisiana—people in letters I had never seen before. Everyone seemed a lot more down to earth than what I had expected. We all talked about how this experience was supposed to “change our lives” so we could “make a difference.” Oh, okay.

Hannah with a Delta Gamma friend at the airport!

IU CAMPUS

Geez, those Greek houses were big. One thing I found interesting was the difference in the Greek culture from school to school…they didn’t even have a grassy knoll? We set up our rooms and beds and met for a big group meeting. It consisted of around 100 fraternity and sorority men and women who knew only surface level things about each other. No one knew what the five days would bring.

MEETINGS

Some negative and some positive things were discussed. I sat there in awe of the experiences that people have had. All in all, the big meetings were to bring back ideas from the smaller group meetings, the great ideas. We shared philanthropy thoughts and great function themes, to name a few.

COMMUNITY SERVICE

We had a day where a few hours were devoted to community service. Yay. Some jobs were harder than others. But there was a point. Our core values that we were founded upon, back in the ol' 1800s, represent why we give our service. I pulled weeds at a natural water filtration duct for several hours…yes, hours. That’s self-sacrifice if I’ve ever seen it. You should have seen some of the monsters we pulled out of the ground. One we named the “hell bush” because of the spikes that tore through our gloves. Knowing that the 15 of us assigned to that site did the work in two hours—that one man would have taken a week to do—is powerful. It’s the little things we do that make a huge impact on the lives of others. Also, we had to do it all in the 90 degree weather while staring at a Steak and Shake across the street—which may have been the ultimate challenge.

THE FOOD

I’m not too picky, but the food was great. We even had a taco day, which seems to be a hit no matter what school you represent. That is all.

GRADUATION

I cried, yes. Small tears that only two people saw, but they were there. At that moment, I realized the impact of this experience. I didn’t want to leave these awesome people that I had gotten to know, but we keep in touch and plan to do so throughout our lives.

POST UIFI

I never thought I would say this after a leadership conference, but I have been changed for the better. ~cliché~ I know, but the goal of the Undergraduate Interfraternity Council is to shed a positive light on our Greek community and develop awareness, leadership, and responsibility within our chapters. The time we shared allowed us to be real with each other; get to know people on a deeper level. I have some awesome ideas for the chapter, and although sometimes we don’t want change, it won’t be all that bad. I realized how proud I was to represent my larger chapter, discuss our philanthropic achievements, brag about the friendships I’ve made, and chat up the school I represent. Many of us—including me—still have a long way to go. I have made lifelong friends and really learned what it means to be a Greek, no matter what the letters. So if you have made it this far, I hope you’ve had a laugh and get the pure enjoyment I gained from this trip. I strongly encourage anyone in the chapter to go—I mean I’m the music chairman and I was all about it. So I’ll leave you with this quote, because all great blogs end with one, right? “Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” -Thomas Edison. I’ve learned to take every opportunity that I can to make a positive name for my organization, no matter the obstacles or how great the challenge.

DL,

Hannah Stroud"

Now, for Hayley's perspective:

"When I arrived in Indiana, I had no idea what to expect. I was nervous because I didn't know what I was getting myself into, and I didn't have a single familiar face by my side.

Hayley at the Tri Delta house at Indiana University

Those nerves quickly faded away into excitement, and then excitement turned into love. Love for the program, love for all of the people in the program, and love for my sorority. I walked away from UIFI with courage, strength, ideas, a deeper understanding of who I am as a leader, and most importantly, a new family from across the country.

Hayley with her "small group" of leaders from universities across the country!

The relationships I formed at UIFI will last a lifetime, and the lessons each and every person taught me go through my mind every day. I was so lucky to meet two amazing Tri Deltas at UIFI who redefined my understanding of sisterhood and gave me so much to aspire to. I wouldn't trade this experience for the world, and looking back on it, it's funny to think I was ever nervous. 

Hayley and her newfound sisters--Tri Deltas from West Georgia and Nebraska

DLAM, 

Hayley Geis"